Stuffily, Joobr sits down in an armchair that looks as though it has been sitting through the ages in an equally stuffy manner. Joobr picks up a martini and spills its contents on the desk, but this is okay, because the desk prefers its martinis dumped by accident.

"Good evening, fair patrons of 'deviantart.' My name is Joobr Joobrson and I am but a simple valet venturing into the vast, existential world of art and imagination." Joobr adjusts its sun-monocle. "I hope to discover the innerworkings of myself and the human condition in this strange and fanciful corner of 'the web.'"

Nearby, Lemon Lemonsworth is trying on a viridian tie patterned with mauve cabbages.

"Not that one, sir," Joobr says with a glance of utmost disapproval.